Devastated, but not destroyed

As I write this weekly blog post, I can still feel the very real sting of rejection and a friendship turned sour. Literally hours ago, someone I admired and loved as a friend and brother severed our friendship permanently. He even went so far as to say he was happier today from not even thinking about our friendship and that he is in a better place from having dumped me as a friend, going so far as to block me from Facebook and his phone. It stings because all I did was be that friend that puts truth and perspective in your face, albeit in a more loving manner. He didn’t like it and was not in a space to receive advice. I had so many hopes for this young man, and one of them was that he would be a good friend and mutual prayer warrior. That hope has been squashed by the reality of his non-receptiveness to what I was offering – friendship.

Like me, anyone who experiences this kind of fallout and separation is understandably devastated at the one-sided decision. I had no say in it, but I have to live with his decision. It hurts deeply. I do believe, however, that life will go on. Feeling devastated does not mean I have been destroyed for all future friendships or chances of new friendships forming. Feeling devastated does not mean I am broken. If anything, I have learned a valuable lesson again from this experience.

That lesson is that life goes on, and as a Christian and woman of God I believe that each experience serves a purpose. There are some simple truths I had to keep reminding myself as my former friend flung hurtful comments at me via text.

  1. I am deeply loved by my Creator and He will not abandon me in my time of need or hurt.
  2. Any kind of “battle” or struggle I face is not mine, but to the same Higher Power that created me. That being said, I need to let Him fight for me. My only job should be to keep moving forward and being the good person I am.
  3. These struggles may not be easy, but my track record from bouncing back and being victorious in the end has been 100%. In other words, if it hasn’t killed me, then I will be okay in the end.
  4. Despite the darkness surrounding me (negativity, sadness, anger, etc.), there is still a measure of goodness in this life and Light will prevail over this present darkness.
  5. Let go, and let God. It’s what He’s good at. If I was meant to fix every one of my problems easily, then I’d be superhuman. As it stands, I am quite human and the impossible is called such for a reason. I’m good at being me, so I’m going to let God be and do what He does best… be God in my life.

I AM Divine Love ImageIn moments like the one I was reeling from earlier, I turn to my self-affirmation statements, or what I like to call my I AM statements. I know I’ve shared these before, but going back over my I AM statements centers me and reminds me that I am worthy and special. The one I AM statement that stood out to me was this: I AM LOVED. Regardless of what my former friend said, the simple truth is that I AM loved. That does not change when someone I once called friend decides he no longer wishes to share brotherly love between us. I AM loved because I love myself, and I believe my Creator God loves me. Why else would I have existed?

In my book series, The Last Prophet (Books One through Five), we see our main characters struggle through different issues, and even combat the threat of death. Ultimately, though they seem devastated and hurt, the main characters always triumph. Those triumphs sometimes come in the form of lessons learned (like me), or being vindicated by others who discover the truth. Whatever the case may be for you and I, we are not destroyed. Maybe a bit hurt and bruised, but not damaged to the point of no return. There is a Bible verse that talks about this and the imagery speaks of what I wrote here (you can also see

“We are afflicted in every way, but not constrained; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed…” 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 (New American Bible Revised Edition)

So you see, life goes on despite the sting of devastation. We might lose our way for a little bit, but that’s human nature. We just can’t stay there, and in time we will rise above once more. Tonight, I will rise above by listening to music, reading my I AM statements, and reaching out to the ones who do love me.

How do you deal with devastation? What self-affirmations do you need right now? Comment in the space provided.

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